Bullies exhibit a distinctive pattern of harming and humiliating others who are smaller in stature, weaker, younger or in any way more vulnerable than the bully. Bullying  is a deliberate and repeated attempt to cause harm to others with less power. Bullies are made not born and this destructive behavior happens at an early age. Bullies lack empathy and are incapable of understanding the feelings and anxiety  of others . These troubled individuals could not project their aggressive behavior without victims and they target those who lack assertiveness, are generally fearful and exhibit a poor self esteem. Child bullies continue this behavior pattern into adulthood and abuse others such as spouses, off spring and co-workers.

According to research, bullies may have been victims of abuse themselves and exhibit a low self esteem, depression and continue to suffer with mental health problems throughout their adult lives. Seventy-four  percent of bullies are males who suffer the most from emotional problems. Nearly 200,000 children engage in bullying world wide every year.

Children who bully may be victims of physical, emotional  and verbal violence or aggression in the family.  They displace their aggression toward others including adults. They assault or physically abuse peers, have trouble following rules and show little empathy for others. According to research, bullies are at risk for failing academically and becoming involved in drugs and illegal activities. In essence, bullying behavior is a “red flag” that a child has significant difficulty in controlling their aggression and has failed to master this skill.

Bullies beget bullies! It is most likely that a child who is a bully has a parental role model and has sustained abuse and emotional neglect  within the family. This child displaces to peers the aggression exhibited within the family . The absence of empathy for others is also a result of the lack of nurturing of this victim, the bully.

Can you identify someone who demonstrates these patterns of behavior? When the child bully matures conceivably, they may become the spouse and child abusers that we read about in the media. The adult bully may very well be found in your work environment and targeting victims as described above. Knowledge is Power and you must be aware of these perpetrators who can only change through mental health intervention. If this bully resides in your home wether it be a child or an adult, enabling this dangerous and destructive individual is not advised. Do seek outside intervention such as counseling or even reporting any abuse to the authorities which will ultimately help the bully to find the help that is so needed.

Do share “whatsyourfeeling” on this blog post with those that might need to hear your voice.

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